Alley's House!

Here's a picture from last night at the Alley's Fall Festival! Can you believe we have all those children?

Just wanted to share our Halloween Pumpkin!

Happy Halloween Friends!

Remember Me?

Remember Me?

Ever feel like you are standing still while time is spinning? You wonder, what lesson is God trying to teach me and hoping you'd catch on soon enough so you could get to the top of the mountain and sail to the valley? Well, that's how I've been feeling. Where do I fit in? What is my purpose? Am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? Lately my faith has been a struggle. It really made me think on my drive home from ladies night last night...Do I really know how lucky I am. I have a wonderful husband who loves me, two cute boys, a roof over my head, food to eat and clothes to wear. What else do I need? A song played on the radio...Mark Schultz...Remember me! At first I was thinking...YES God, remember me? I'm the one praying for our lot to sell, for my health situation, to find where I need to serve at church, for Jonathan's job situation......And then I actually listened to the song.....Remember Me, when the children leave their Sunday school class with a smile, when a church is quiet with prayer...Oh!...It's not about ME?...It's about YOU! Thank you God, for giving me a husband who wants to give 10% to you and does, even when the numbers don't add up. Thank you God that somehow, all of our bills are paid and we still managed to give the kids a Birthday party. Thank you God, for helping me remember that life isn't about me at all...it's about YOU! Thank you friends for listening and praying for me! I appreciate your friendship!

Interesting Week

Last week was an interesting week for our family. On Monday night, Kelly received word that her Grandfather, Jim Argenbright, had passed away. She had been told that he was ill only hours before. We were taken aback at the news that he had succumbed so quickly. Kelly immediately began preparations to travel to Viriginia for the funeral. In all honesty, there are many levels of emotion regarding this situation. The family in Virginia are...well....a challenge to say the least. On Kelly's heart were so many thoughts and concerns. For her father, who had only recently healed his relationship with this man and who would be the Executor of the will. A position unenviable even in the most devoted families. For her Grandfather, whom she will miss. For the dread of dealing with an extended family whose greed, dishonesty and drama was easily predictable. For the pain of leaving her children at home for 3 days (husband too). All of this weighed heavy. However, there were positives.

Kelly's grief and anticipation of the trip turned into quality time with her sister and family (immediate that is) and a chance for me to spend 3 days as Mr. Mom. It was a really cool and needed experience on my part. Gabriel, Noah and I continued home schooling and daily routines. We went to the library and on field trips. We kept the house clean and I was still able to work some from home while the boys slept. It was great! I got to be a Consultant, Teacher, Maid, Cook, Punching Bag, Bus Driver, Window Washer, Toy Mechanic, Mediator, Father and Referee. It was an amazing week and we had a blast! Yet, let us be honest. Of all the roles I got to play, Punching Bag and Father are the only ones I claim to fill. Okay, maybe Toy Mechanic. Other than that, I'm a poor substitution. Simply put...the boys (ALL the boys) slept better the night Mom came through the door.

The Memory to Remember

Well, for the first time, I have experienced my son being better at something than me. For those who don't know, we are not speaking of a teenager here. He's not even four! I didn't achieve true victory over my father in a game until I was almost driving. Though the only game we really played in competition was Chess. Anyway, last night our family had a wonderful evening. Our small group was cancelled which gave us an opportunity to seize the night and declare it "family night." We took a trip to Target, saw Vance hanging out in the parking lot waiting on Michelle to jump his car off; All was normal.

When we arrived home, Gabriel wanted to play the game Memory. So, I put some blankets on the floor and our family crowded around the game and settled in to play. Little did I realize, I was being hustled by this four year old Memory Shark. He tied me the first game! The next game I won by one. Looking back, this would have been the opportune time for Gabe to encourage me to start playing for money. I can hear it now. "Man, Dad! You're good at this. Too bad we aren't playing for money."

After a while, Kelly took Noah outside and Gabe wanted to play a few more games. Mana a Mana. Double or nothin', pride is the bet. Again, we tied. Then, alas...the final game was a two pair victory for Gabriel. The Archangel of Memory. He defeated me. No help. No taking it easy on him by his old man. He just beat me.....and defeat has never been sweeter.

All work and no play makes Jonathan go crazy!!

Well, you may have noticed that I haven't been blogging much lately. I have had ideas. Yet when facing the prospect of typing them out, I found a lack of time and energy. I have been pretty busy across the board. Between work, church, work at church, church at work, family, etc., I have found myself shying away from blogging, which I enjoy. So, I'm back! I have found the time (though in a brief moment at work...forgive me) to blog. Here's what is happening lately:

• Still trying to sell our lot...(anybody...anybody?)
• Been to a REALLY cool Willow Creek Church Leadership Conference
• Have to write an article based on this leadership conference for my work
• Cool, fun opportunities on the horizon (can't give much detail yet)
• God is working on really great stuff at our church. Primarily in the following areas:
  
• Outreach Team
  
• Small Group Ministry
• Leadership/Volunteer Organization
  
• Been having and will have a lot of meetings on these subjects
  
• Gabriel has begun home school preschool and he is doing awesome! He really enjoys school and is like a sponge.
• Noah is discovering everything, everywhere and putting all of it in my living room.
• The project I am on has picked up in pace. Lots to do.
• Our Small Group is going well. It is stable, relationships are growing and we are going through a new series on marriage.
• God has been working in my heart, mind and soul and in my family. He has given me clarity on many issues (including a new vision for our Outreach Team which I am really excited about), while also stretching my faith and truly challenging me in many ways. All good, yet difficult and taxing.
  

I have noticed in the past couple of months that my energy and morale is waning. Thus, the title of this blog. One of the topics of the leadership conference was learning to understand what charges your batteries and what drains them. All of the above items I LOVE doing. I feel great about God working in my life and feel alive when serving. Yet, when the meetings are over and I come home late, it's quiet. My walk to the door is dimly lit by the porch light left on by my wife. My boys are already in bed and a "bedtime calm" has fallen over my home. At those moments, when there is nothing to do and my RPMs drop, I feel the strain. It isn't bad. We all feel it. And thanks to this conference, I think it is healthy to notice it, acknowledge it and find a way to recharge. That is my next mission. Should I choose to accept it. And you should do the same. :)

THE BIG BOYS!

Yesterday afternoon I took Gabe to Celebration Baptist Church to participate in their Awana Program. He acted like a typical three year old on the way there...timid. "Mommy, will you stay with me?" I promised I would!
We get there and I register him and then we sit down in the gym on the floor. Meanwhile there are tons of other children running around the gym playing with balls and just having a great time. Gabe asks if he can play too. I said sure! He gets a ball and starts playing and this older boy comes and tries to take it from him. Immediatly the mommy in me is thinking "You better give my kid that ball back!" But, I just sat there for a minute to see what was going to happen. Ended up, Gabe and this boy had a wonderful time. To the boy's surprise, Gabe could snatch the ball and chase after him as well as he. They played for awhile and then....other BIG BOYS started playing keep away from my baby. Again...mommy instinct kicks in and I tell them that playing keep away isn't nice and they should play together. Gabe just kept chasing them. He didn't care. Gabe actually ended up with the ball at one point and ran for his little life. A mean BIG BOY pushed him down right on the gym floor. My brave son got up and just kept on chasing them. Gabe taught me that he is big enough to take care of himself even when BIG BOYS play keep away from him. I left the gym feeling so proud of my little guy for standing up to those boys!
On the way to his class he quietly looked up at me and said, "You're not going to leave me are you?" Just kind of made it sweeter~

Fear Factor

Well, if I hadn't already been admitted to the "Official Motherhood Club" I was this week. My boys have passed around this wonderful 24-hour bug the past two days and I think now...I can officially handle anything Fear Factor can dish out!
Gabe woke up Monday with a tummy ache so he sat on the "potty" to go to the bathroom. Little did he know, nausea means something different. He threw up all over himself! Being the nice Mom I am...I grabbed the garbabe can...then came the pee! As he got sick, while sitting on the potty, he started to pee. The garbage can became a catch what I could! Just when I thought I was in the clear; it was now Noah's turn...

Thinking I was having quite a normal day, I decided to go to Comcast (all the way across town) and about two minutes before we got there Noah just screamed. When I turned to see why...you guessed it, he got sick. All over the car seat, himself, and the car! Luckily I had extra clothes and plenty of wipes! I put Gabe in the booster seat, Noah in Gabe's carseat and back home we went! So...Fear Factor here I come!

The One

I love my wife.

She’s the one I have loved so desperately since the age of fifteen.

She’s the one whose love I have craved, desired and needed every moment since that day.
She’s the one whose voice fills a void I had never known existed.
She’s the one whose pain I feel, joy I strive for, happiness I long for, passion I desire, encouragement I thrive on and life I will protect with my own.

She’s the one whose laugh, whose love, whose smile….whose very being drives my existence.
She’s the one to which all that I do, all that I have…all that I am I give.
She’s the one to whom my children come when hurt, happy, excited or scared. As do I.
She’s the one from which our children will grow stronger and wiser.
She’s the one who gives me strength and yet is my greatest weakness.
She’s the one for which I do not need a commandment to love.

For she’s the one.

To my wife of seven years…you have always been the one.

The Capitol

Yesterday, I had a chance to take the boys for an outing. It was just us guys, since Kelly was at a doctor's appointment. I will admit that this kind of outing doesn't happen enough. It is something I must strive to do more. So, for that reason I wanted to make the most of it. Gabriel wanted to go to the "Red and Blue" place to eat. Having missed this conversation he must have had with his mother, I was at a loss. Kelly was able to figure out his logic and we deduced that he was referring to KFC. So, after some good chicken and yummy biscuits, the men were off for an outing.

I decided to take the boys to the Capitol. I actually wasn't sure if they would enjoy it or not. I was taking a gamble. To my surprise and joy, Gabe was REALLY excited about going to the "big building" (as described driving up Appalachee Pkwy). So, excited, in fact that I thought he was going to drive me insane when I couldn't find a parking space right away. "Daddy, you missed the big building! We have to go back! You can park there. How about there? Can you park there, daddy!?"

I first took them both to the 22nd floor observation deck of the new Capitol. As soon as the elevator doors opened and they could see for miles in every direction, they went crazy! They loved it! They both climbed up on the ledge beside the windows and leaned on the glass to look down on the city below. "Daddy, look at the little cars!" "Hey, I see a yellow car!" "Whoa! Daddy, is that your work way over there?" It was a lot of fun.

We then went into the old Capitol and checked out the Governor's office and some of the cool artifacts they have in each room. It was an opportunity to teach the boys some cool history. Again, they really seemed to enjoy it and Gabriel wanted to go into every rooom. Unfortunately, we couldn't stay long. Mommy's appointment was over and we had to go meet her. I told Gabe "we shall return." Apparently, he begged his mom to do just that. "Mommy, we didn't see everything. Can we go back now?" YES! My boys like history!!

On a closing note, I have to share my favorite moment. It was when we first arrived on the 22nd floor of the new building. I wanted them to have fun on our little outing and hoped they would enjoy the view and the history as much as I do. After playing and looking out every pane of glass, Gabriel spoke to me in the most childlike and sincere tone. "Wow...this is cool!...Daddy, thank you for bringing me here." Going back to work has never been harder.

You're in My Space

My Space. Hmm.....To join My Space, is to lose my space. Here are my thoughts on this new and rapidly world dominating new social site. I'm just not a fan. Honestly, it isn't that I don't like it. Well, yes...yes it is. I don't really like it. Maybe it is just the way I am. I have never been one to want to go to a high school reunion or chat online with random people. I'm much more of a face to face socializer. And since My Space is a 24 hour 7 day a week high school reunion and online chat room with random people....naah...not for me.

Something else I struggle with is a little more philosophical. Friends come in and out of your life as you grow older. Life moves forward and changes. You change. This is really necessary, in my mind. What My Space does, is to provide a way for which everyone who has ever known you can stay in your life. It means people that in the past would have played their role in your life and moved on....now find you again and try to pick it up where you left off. Is that healthy? Can you keep up with friends...past, present and future and still move forward in life? Okay...so that's deep, but I have considered it.

Then there is the whole "I see you and you can't see me" aspect of it. I heard a radio discussion about the success of My Space, recently. It struck me when one of the individuals said that it's success is due to the fact that it is voyeurism. Before you get defensive, I'm not calling you a pervert. My Space simply provides a chance for you to check out what's going on in someone else's world, view pictures of them, see discussions between them and their friends all without interaction on your part. Having always been the "Close the blinds!" kinda guy...I don't like the idea of posting my pictures on the website so someone else can go..."I found Jonathan Conrad's My Space site....he looks so ______." Whatever the blank is there....I would rather see you face to face than have you click into my life, judge it and move on.

Kelly recently signed up on My Space. Which is why I am thinking about it. She enjoys it a little more than me. She has had several high school friends check in, posted pictures of us on the site and searched out many of her friends. She's had a lot of fun with it. She might win me over eventually. However, currently I am still unsure. But for now....you too can be invade My Space.

"Run for your Yikes!"

This afternoon a storm passed over Conradville! Gabe was opening the back door and "BOOM!" He and Noah were in the living room and I was on the computer. At that moment, Noah screamed with terror and both boys darted for me. Upon their arrival, Noah was holding his chest. His little heart was beating so fast I thought it was going to beat out of there. After reassurance from Mommy that everything was okay, the two brave adventurers decided they would try and open the door again. They continued their adventure several times running from the back room to the living room and opening the door. Gabe told me, "Mommy, we're trying to scare the thunder!" Each time they would run back to me, Gabe would yell to Noah, "Run for your YIKES!" Hope you enjoyed their adventure as much as I did!

Circle of Life...

Now that you're done humming the theme to Lion King, let us proceed with my thoughts. Today is my birthday. I'm now officially in my late twenties (We pause now for every person over 30 to groan). I have been thinking of my parents in realtion to this day.

I am the youngest of three. The only son. I wondered to myself what they would have been like 27 years ago. Two children. Pre-Jonathan. What a different world that must have been, eh? No! You can't go back! Here is the scary part. They were both my age. How weird it is to realize that I am officially half of my parents age. I'm sure they'll love reading it when I put it this way....they've doubled in age since my birth!! (Sorry, guys.) I have that affect. People seem to age significantly in my prescence.

Anyway, I have been wondering how different they were then, if at all. My parents have always been the source of wisdom that I rely on. Yet, when I was born...they were only 27 year old parents wondering what the next day would bring. It is so hard to think of your parents as...well...you. It makes me realize, as a 27 year old father of two, that I have big shoes to fill. So...what will I be like in 27 years? July 21st, 2033...here I come.

The Three Conooges

When we had a son and then another, I immediately began dreaming of the days of football fame; baseball stars, even soccer (if they REALLY had to play it) champions! What I didn’t anticipate, however, is you must first go through the “Stooges” years.

I first discovered this when Gabriel, at just over a year old, walked right into the garage door….as it was opening. “Son, come on. You’ve gotta wait until the door opens.” But, alas, there was my boy…clothes lined by the garage door. Then he was climbing the Mount Everest of our bar stools. Brave; Yes. Yet, this Everest falls over. One busted lip and scar later, he was off again and the fun continued.

Then, Noah (or, Larry, if you will) was born. Poor, little guy never had a chance. With Curly knocking chairs over on him and those pesky garage doors (yes, he did it too. The same thing… “Come on, son….”) he was doomed from the start. He has now busted his lip for the second or third time (we lose count), broken his arm, scratched his face, been smacked countless times with various objects by his big brother (Curly) and he is just beginning the “Stooges” years. He’s not even two yet!

We all remember the “Stooges” years. We all had them. Maybe your enemy wasn’t the garage door. Perhaps it was that step you never could remember was there. Maybe that chandelier your grandmother refused to hang higher than four feet from the ground. Maybe it was always forgetting that you should stand back when your friend is swinging the bat. Whatever it was, we were all there.

Now, I must to tell you something. Kids, sons especially, cause some sort of mysterious degeneration. Though never graceful by any means, I have noticed that I have to be careful not to come out of every day bruised. So, consequently, my wife gets to deal with the Three Conooges.

Fathers, a word to you. Though, the time will come when our children will be coordinated, graceful and show unlimited common sense, they must first gain an understanding of gravity, the importance of looking forward….when walking forward, the fact that they grow taller and countertops don’t and the timing of a good garage exit. Until then, good luck to us all…nyuk, nyuk.

Signed,

Moe

The Night of the Ninjas

It was a dark and stormy night. A heavy storm had covered the peaceful neighborhood of Killearn Lakes. Menacing thunder rolled overhead as brief flashes of lightning brightened the sky. As a fellowship of friends concluded their time together a cloak of darkness descended on their home. Was it the storm that disabled the power? Perhaps; Or might it have been something more?

We were hanging out in our Home Team last night and had just concluded our study, when the power was knocked out by a heavy storm. In minutes Kelly had candles up and I had the flashlight out (cause men need powerful beams of light...not that sissy candle stuff) and we were all laughing and having even more fun than when the power was on. The kids had fun with the flashlights and all was well. Gabriel, however, was wise to what was really happening. We adults were so naive. He kept his wisdom to himself as he pretented to play. All the while keeping a close eye on the dark shadows.

First thing this morning I received a call at work. It was from Gabriel. He wanted to tell me about the power going out. It was all he had talked about since waking up. He quickly informed me of what he knew to be the truth. It was no accident. "Daddy, last night...when the power...the power went out because of the Ninjas knocked it out." It was the Ninjas all along!

That's my boy!!

What Happens Next?

The times I've looked away from you,
You've made your path apparent.
Why is it so unclear now,
In the midst of your presence?

I see your work, in retrospect.
The path already given me.
It is beautiful to see.

I could spend my life walking backwards;
Studying your great work.
What a fool I would be.

To gaze upon the perfect past
Is to miss the perfect plan.

What happens next, my God?

The path behind me,
So wondrous and so clear.
Yet the path before me shadowed.
Shrouded in mystery and uncertainty.

Father, let us whisper now.
What happens next?

My eyes are shielded, perhaps with doubt.
Poised, my foot lifted, I am ready to take a step.
Which direction shall I go?

If this knowledge is to be withheld
Until it comes to pass,
Then bless my mortal patience, Lord.

Forgive my constant questioning.
For I wait anxiously to know,
What happens next?
In which direction should I go?

Walk a Little Slower...

I received this poem from my family on Father's Day. As I was rushing off to church, I made it a point to stop and enjoy the breakfast that Kelly had made for me (with help from the boys). I was then presented with this poem. It hit me more than Kelly expected. More than I told her. It reminded me of the father I want to be. Of my responsibility to not only do things for my children and take care of them, but to teach them how to take care of themselves. It isn't about telling my children what time it is. It's about showing them how the watch works.

To each of my sons, I say this. I want to walk a little slower, son. And so, I will. I promise.

Walk a Little Slower Daddy

"Walk a little slower, Daddy."
Said a little child so small.
"I'm following in your footsteps,
and I don't want to fall.

Sometimes your steps are very fast.
Sometimes they're hard to see.
So walk a little slower, Daddy,
For you are leading me.

Someday when I'm all grown up,
You're what I want to be.
Then I will have a little child
Who'll want to follow me.

And I would want to lead just right;
And know that I was true.
So, walk a little slower, Daddy.
For I must follow you."

Wisdom and Ambition: Incompatible?

All of us have seen the Christian “Fish” bumper stickers. Most of us have seen a Darwin version eating the Christian version and another “Truth” version eating the Darwin. I wonder. Could we apply the same illustration to wisdom and ambition?

We equate wisdom with peace, knowledge and stability. We equate ambition with energy, risk, and instability. If we are ambitious, do we blow by and miss the peace and knowledge? If we focus on wisdom, are we too caught up on peace and stability that we miss opportunities in life? Are these two traits incompatible? Does wisdom eat ambition? Does ambition prevent wisdom?

This question is one of relevance to me as of late. I look into the eyes of my sons and see the determination, the energy, the youthful edge that all children have. No fear. That, ladies and gentlemen is ambition at it’s purest. Children have it. Oh, so much more than you or I. Afraid of nothing…..until they grow wise. A child will conquer the furniture by the time they are two. Climbing up to the summit of Mount Leathercouch, the heroic Noah plans to prove his superiority to gravity by jumping, sans parachute, to the base below. No fear. And he will have no fear, until the moment dad isn’t there to catch him. One time is all it takes and he is immediately “wise.” He will then tell other preschool superheroes “Think not, young ones, of jumping from Mount Leathercouch. For yours will not be a successful landing.”

A young boy runs to his grandfather and claims, “Papa, I am going to be President when I grow up!” The grandfather responds, “That’s great, my child, but first you must register to vote. Once you’ve registered as a Republican, you need to run for local office. Establish yourself in politics for a few years. After that, we send you to the Senate. It will require a lot of work and we’ll have to sell a lot of lemonade to get you there, but it can be done. Finally, we raise a few million and you’re off to the White House. Great idea!” We all know that isn’t how it goes. We feed ambition at a young age. We all tell our children, “You can be anything you want to be.” At what point did our elders stop encouraging that ambition and begin calling it “youthful arrogance?”

Here is my struggle. I thrive on being ambitious. I sit here under the fluorescent light of my office and wonder what’s next. What couch can I jump from and how will it end. I can’t wait for the excitement!! Then I realize that I’m not a child any longer. I find my ambition waning in favor of stability, for that must be the wise decision. Is this true? Must I truly give up ambition for wisdom? And if so, wisdom is just a consolation prize?

Road Not Taken....

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference."

Today I was pondering my decisions in life. I'm young. I know that. Yet, I have been blessed enough to have made several life decisions that many my age will not make for a while. Most of those decisions have been the "one less traveled by" and praise God they "made all the difference."

Kelly and I are currently making several big decisions that will guide our future together. I thought today of Robert Frost. It has been years since I looked upon his words. The last I read the words of The Road Not Taken it was with the eyes of innocence and naivety. I took it as any 17 year old boy would in high school. He meant "Be risky! Go for it! Be different! Take the road less traveled and damn the consequences!" (sorry, but in high school that's what I would have said) I read it much differently now.

As a father; a husband; the leader of my household and only income my decisions impact much more than they ever have...and they aren't just my decisions anymore.

So, I return to his poem.

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference."

Wow! My heart races when I read it. Without a doubt, I want to take the one less traveled by! But...is it wide enough for my minivan? Does it have rest stops for the kids? Do they have security? Gas stations? Have we budgeted for the trip; for this road may be a little longer? Dang! I lost Noah's pacifier! They better have a Wal-mart on this road! Much more to consider these days.

And yet, as a driven, stubborn, determined and admittedly opportunistic man, I can't tell you how much I thrive on the idea of claiming "I took the chance and I was right." I desire to be the hero. I long to make that decision; choose the road that gives my family the life I desperately want to give them. Not material, but Freedom; Protection; Security. I guess, perhaps I haven't traveled as far from the 17 year old boy as I thought.

Coming Onboard

Alright. The world stage will never be the same. There is a Conrad blogger. (Hey! Where did everybody go?)